The first annual power rankings, ranked according to where I'd most like to spend time.
Also, there are too many suburbs in this town. I tried my best here.
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| [Richfield dreams.] |
TWIN CITY SUBURB POWER RANKINGS
1. Richfield -- your urban hometown, now with awesome bike lanes; this is best suburb these days
2. Hopkins -- by far the most rental and affordable housing in any suburb, plus tons of bike trails, and soon to have a light rail train
3. Miesville -- best ballpark and burger combo in the state
4. Robbinsdale -- lovely main street with great food
5. North St. Paul -- lovely main street with OK food
6. Excelsior -- quaint-if-far-too-bougie perfectly situated walkable downtown on the lake; they have parking meters for boats!
7. St. Louis Park -- they really are trying, honestly
8. Roseville -- sometimes sort of has sidewalks, nice lake and parks
9. Wayzata -- awesome lakefront downtown and bike trail; the people tho…
10. Bloomington -- sometimes sort of has sidewalks, nice rivers, close to other cities, has light rail
11. Hastings -- amazing riverfront downtown history, many walkable sidewalks
12. Willernie -- one-of-a-kind place with cool dive bars to boot
13. Shakopee -- historic river downtown with sidewalks
14. South St. Paul -- some great sidewalks; weird enough to be cool
15. Columbia Heights -- has sidewalks, old theater, diversity and awesome strip mall shops
16. West St. Paul -- sidewalks, diversity, some historic bits
17. Lauderdale -- no sidewalks but a bizarre pocket between STP and MPLS with great views of industry and freeways
18. Stillwater -- great historic river downtown with sidewalks, but that bridge tho
19. Chaska -- great historic river downtown with sidewalks
20. Nowthen -- best name
21. Lilydale -- scenic, has the benefit of not really existing
22. Hilltop -- the only suburb 100% surrounded by another suburb; has a Flame Burger!
23. White Bear Lake -- quaint walkable downtown, a little too quaint
24. Anoka -- i want to hate it but i can’t hate the historic downtown
25. Burnsville -- well, they tried
26. Falcon Heights -- if only there were somewhere to go; this really should be part of STP
27. Shoreview -- best off-street suburb bike lanes in the state, every ‘burb should do this
28. Fridley -- kind of like a city, i guess
29. Newport -- quaint town right on the river, if only it didn’t smell so bad
30. Brooklyn Park -- the most diverse suburb, now with a City Council that's not all white!
31. Mendota -- the smallest town closest to the big city
32. Mound -- best mini golf in the state
33. Afton -- good place to bike to or to be from
34. Landfall -- lake and 10 mile per hour streets!
35. Dayton -- i like a bar there
36. Brooklyn Center -- i hear it’s cool but cannot personally say
37. Mendota Heights -- i grew up here
38. Coon Rapids -- has a nice a roller rink
39. Edina -- has a nice library
40. Inver Grove Heights -- the part along the river is cool
41. Chanhassen -- good ads for the theater, i guess, some sidewalks in farm fields
42. Coates -- great bar in the shadow of the refinery
43. Lakeville -- at least they built an arts center
44. Apple Valley -- if you can find the park, it’s cool
45. Maple Grove -- they tried to create a downtown sort of
46. St. Paul Park -- right on the river is nice
47. Little Canada -- the other Flame Burger!
48. St. Bonifacius -- cute place to bike to
49. Marine on St. Croix -- also a cute place to bike to
50. Plymouth -- i have heard there are lakes here, minus points for having opt-out buses
51. Elko New Market -- i biked to the speedway once
52. Cottage Grove -- a least there’s an old street
53. Maplewood -- should really be Saint Paul
54. Scandia -- quaint, and they have a bike rack now
55. Medicine Lake -- hosted the Art Shanties a few times
56. Shorewood -- not to be confused with Shoreview, they’ll have you know
57. Golden Valley -- they invented the Minnesotan corporate campus
58. Victoria -- I like the brewery
59. Ramsey -- Anoka’s evil twin
60. Forest Lake -- i bought something on Craigslist here once and it was a weird experience
61. Woodbury -- yeah
62. Eagan -- not a fan
63. Oak Park Heights -- I blame them for the bridge somehow
64. Medina -- like Edina but worse
65. Eden Prairie -- Bearpath is in this
66. Crystal -- i think i went here once
67. Dellwood -- points for having my Grandpa’s name
68. Minnetonka -- birthplace of LeAnn Chin’s
69. Oakdale -- nothing to report
70. Vadnais Heights -- tore down the best dive bar in town
71. Blaine -- good place to play soccer
72. Spring Lake Park -- used to have a decent mini golf course but it was torn down
73. Rosemount -- worse than Lakeville, somehow
74. St. Anthony -- despite some sidewalks, everything is bad here
75. Farmington -- is like it sounds
76. Sunfish Lake -- a lake surrounded by millionaires with good lawyers
77. Circle Pines -- not sure where this is
78. Deephaven -- if you can find it, you must live there
79. Arden Hills -- their City Council seems terrible
80. Hugo -- good awards ceremony
81. Lino Lakes -- everyone here voted for Trump
82. East Bethel -- everyone here voted for Trump
83. Independence -- everyone here voted for Trump
84. Rogers -- the only things people care about here are freeways and fences
85. Ham Lake -- five-car garages are the norm
86. North Oaks -- Jim Crockarell lives here
87. Lake Elmo -- the worst
UNRANKED
(lack of information)
I don’t know where these are or haven’t intentionally been and don't really plan on it either
Mounds View --
New Brighton --
Savage --
Tonka Bay --
Jordan --
Andover --
Bayport --
Belle Plaine --
Bethel --
Birchwood Village --
Carver --
Centerville --
Champlin --
Cologne --
Orono --
Osseo --
Columbus --
Mahtomedi --
Minnetonka Beach --
Minnetrista --
Maple Plain --
Corcoran --
Gem Lake --
Grant --
Greenfield --
Greenwood --
Hamburg --
Hampton --
Lake St. Croix Beach --
Lakeland --
Lakeland Shores --
Lexington --
Long Lake --
Loretto --
Mayer --
New Germany --
New Hope --
New Trier --
Norwood Young America --
Oak Grove --
Pine Springs --
Randolph --
Spring Park --
St. Francis --
St. Marys Point --
Vermillion --
Waconia --
Watertown --
Woodland --